What happened to us?
After all is said and done, what kills me the most is that I lost my best friend in the process..
If it’s meant to be, it will be..
It starts today!
Although I’m writing this at 5am, I have consciously made the decision that I am gonna change my perspective on life and change my habits. If I don’t start now, when am I gonna do it? When I’m 30? No.. because I’m gonna do it right now (well, in a few hours).
These past few months after graduation has been somewhat bittersweet. I mean, yes I’m done with school (in the meantime), but what good is that if I’m not doing anything about it? I know this isn’t just me because people who have graduated tell me all the time that they too have been in the same position. I’m not gonna sugar coat it and say, “oh it’s just a phase”. That’s only an excuse. I don’t want to make excuses anymore. It sucks! Not only because I’m not doing anything about it, but because it makes me feel worthless and pathetic. I feel pathetic waking up past noon. I feel pathetic not being able to be financially stable. I feel pathetic that I have spent years in school just to lay in bed and sleep? What?! That’s not right at all.
Although these past few months have been a roller coaster of losing and losing some more, I feel that if I weren’t in this position, I wouldn’t be able to realize that I am worth more than this. I can live my dreams and pursue my goals if I just start now. It doesn’t have to be anything big, but as long as I start then I know I will get there.
Believe me, if you’re in the same boat as me then take this as a reminder, as a boost of motivation. We are in this together. And guess what? You and I have something in common, and that is that we are starting today.
So tell me this, are you willing to start today?
Because I sure as hell am!
Sometimes I wish you’d just message me..
Caved in. Wtf.
…everything is a wtf moment these days.
I miss you. I miss being able to tell you the most random shit about my life. I miss hearing your voice. I miss your contagious laugh. I miss watching movies with you. I miss being with you. I miss your flaws. I miss your annoying habits. I miss everything about you. I just miss you. What the hell did I do?
I miss my best friend..
He told me my voice was like heaven to his ears. It hurt so much to hear that, yet all I wanted was to melt in his arms. “Don’t say that” was all I could muster. “Please, don’t say that..”