the sound of love.

It starts today!

Although I’m writing this at 5am, I have consciously made the decision that I am gonna change my perspective on life and change my habits. If I don’t start now, when am I gonna do it? When I’m 30? No.. because I’m gonna do it right now (well, in a few hours). 

These past few months after graduation has been somewhat bittersweet. I mean, yes I’m done with school (in the meantime), but what good is that if I’m not doing anything about it? I know this isn’t just me because people who have graduated tell me all the time that they too have been in the same position. I’m not gonna sugar coat it and say, “oh it’s just a phase”. That’s only an excuse. I don’t want to make excuses anymore. It sucks! Not only because I’m not doing anything about it, but because it makes me feel worthless and pathetic. I feel pathetic waking up past noon. I feel pathetic not being able to be financially stable. I feel pathetic that I have spent years in school just to lay in bed and sleep? What?! That’s not right at all.

Although these past few months have been a roller coaster of losing and losing some more, I feel that if I weren’t in this position, I wouldn’t be able to realize that I am worth more than this. I can live my dreams and pursue my goals if I just start now. It doesn’t have to be anything big, but as long as I start then I know I will get there.

Believe me, if you’re in the same boat as me then take this as a reminder, as a boost of motivation. We are in this together. And guess what? You and I have something in common, and that is that we are starting today. 

So tell me this, are you willing to start today?

Because I sure as hell am!

Find out who you are and do it on purpose.
Dolly Parton

There will come a time when you believe everything is finished. That will be the beginning.
Louis L’amour

Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is life but getting up is living.
(New favourite quote. Saw this on my twitter feed. Words to live by.)

25 things to do before you turn 25-UPDATED

2. Kiss someone you think is out of your league; kiss models and med students and entrepreneurs with part-time lives in Dubai and don’t worry about if they’re going to call you afterward.

5. Recognize freedom as a 5:30 a.m. trip to the diner with a bunch of strangers you’ve just met.

23. Leave the country under the premise of “finding yourself.” This will be unsuccessful. Places do not change people. Instead, do a lot of solo drinking, read a lot of books, have sex in dirty hotels, and come home when you start to miss it.

-edit*I have at least 1 year and a bit to finish this list ;)

I feel like being mad at the world, but maybe I’ll just sleep.

I’m so tired of life. Honestly.

I need a break from life.

I never listen to anyone.

I guess I really am stubborn. That’s the Taurean side of me. But putting all wizardry aside (lol), I’ve noticed that I have a hard time learning from others’ experiences. I feel like I have a mind of a child, but when someone tells me not to do something, I end up doing it.

Exhibit A: My bangs.

A few weeks ago I posted a picture up on Instagram asking for opinions. I wanted to know whether or not it was a good idea to cut my bangs again. Majority of my friends who responded said, “No, don’t cut it—no bangs is better”. On the other hand, only the fewest (more like 1) said I should cut my bangs. And what did I end up doing? I got them cut, and ever since I did I’ve been wanting them to grow. 

Everyone who knows me knows my hair grows slooooooow. So that doesn’t make it any better, does it?

Exhibit A: End.

So there you go my friends, a prime example of my stubbornness  It’s not all that great y’know. But boy, I’d rather learn from my own experiences than those of others.

I’d rather not live through someone else’s experiences, anyway. 

I need a change.

I am so over my job.